Drunken Ramblings

So I'm a bit drunk right now. A bottle of Chilean Merlot Rose wine is the culprit that's gotten me into this state and very nice it was too. I've been drinking it over the past few hours whilst watching episodes from the tail end of season 3 of Battlestar Galactica. Just got 2 left to watch at the time of writing... no that's not right, typing this post to my blog. And I'll watch those in a bit. As well as munch on another Magnum ice cream. I've eaten two tonight, but I bought 6 of them earlier, so I'm not about to run out anytime soon.

Got a wicked chocolate craving that choc ices just cannot sate. Time to get dressed (I'm dressed now, but in lounge about the house clothes you know) and head to the 24 hour Tesco supermarket to raid their confectionary dept I think.

One More Lonely Night

So I'm sat here drinking a pint of Jim Beam and cola and feeling just a bit sorry for myself. I shouldn't be, after all I've had a pretty good day. I had the day off work, and so I slept in late. I spent the latter part of the morning and early afternoon engaged in an enjoyable roleplay session online with noeva (one of the kajirae in my Slaver House chatroom). I then cycled to the cinema and watched Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End, which if you've not seen it, is well worth going to see. And if you do go to see it, stay until after the credits to see the final ending for at least two of the series characters. Very worthwhile waiting to do so, and you'll get to hear the fantastic music as you do so.

The day went wrong I think when I decided to go out tonight. I went first to Henry's pub which was boring, and then on to Subway to get something to eat. There I had the misfortune to run into the fucking moron who works in the same store as me named Thomas. Honestly the man is a walking argument for infanticide. He should have been shot at birth! So I ate my 6" sub whilst listeing to his insane drivel in the background, leaving as soon as he noticed me and started trying to talk to me.

I headed to the Market House pub which was busy but not packed. Saturday night used to be 80's night, but now seems to be "the DJ plays whatever he wants too" night. Which is a shame, 80's night was usually good, tonight... not so much. Leaving there after a couple drinks, I headed to Yate's Wine Bar as I knew my friends Derek Adams and Tony Searle were going there as tonight was the final of the local Battle of the Bands. It cost 5 pounds to get in. I should have saved my money and come home. As it was I stayed for one drink, whilst listening to the band slaughter their way through a couple "songs". If they got to the regional final I shudder to think on how bad the groups that didn't make it were!

So I'm sat here now, typing this blog entry, which is a rarity in itself, as of late I've largely lost interest in this outlet. I think I would have been better off having stayed home tonight and saved myself the money I spent on food, drinks and door fees. I'll never meet anyone staying indoors though, but then I never meet anyone when I go out. I'm too shy to approach any woman I like, and no woman ever gives me so much as a second glance.

What Men Say (And What We Mean!)

Okay so I've shamelessly stolen this article from a message board that I frequent, but I don't care cos it's really funny.

"I'M GOING FISHING"
Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."

"IT'S A GUY THING"
Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical".

"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR..."
Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Means: "I have no idea how it works."

"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."
Means: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra."

"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD".
Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Means: "Are you still talking?"

"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."

"I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES".
Means: "The girl selling them on the corner had great tits."

"OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."

"HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING".
Means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."

"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."

"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Means: "What did you catch me at?"

"I HEARD YOU."
Means: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me."

"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE"
Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."

"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC"
Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."

"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."

"WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK"
Means: "I make the messes, she cleans them up."