The End is Nigh...

Or at least, sat here, typing this, it certainly seems that way. I'll explain. I got laid off from work back at the end of September and have yet to find a new job since. I have a pitiful income courtesy of the government due to Housing Benefit. I did have Jobseekers Allowance money coming in as well, but that has been suspended for 9 weeks due to me not applying for a job back in November. The job in question was asking for Experienced Bar Staff. I have never worked in a bar in my life and thus did not apply for the job as frankly I felt it would be a waste of my time and the Bar's for me to do so. The Job Centre disagreed and decided to punish me for this by suspending my allowance until April, when it was due to expire anyway.

So I now have an income of approx £45 a week. My rent is £140 a month, and on top of that I pay the entirety of the house's Council Tax (which has been reduced due to Council Tax Benefit, but is still about £95 a month). This years is fully paid now, so that will start again in April. Also I pay 1/3rd of the cost of the energy bills that the house receives, and currently owe £145 or so to E-ON for the latest bill. I have an overdraft of about £135 with HSBC bank at the time of writing. I am also £240 in debt right now to my housemate Tony Searle who had to cover me for the rent last month and my share of the bill to our previous energy supplier EDF. So basically I'm screwed.

I have opened a new bank account with the Co-operative Bank so that my meagre income does not get swallowed up by bank charges and the overdraft, but even so the amount I receive does not cover my outgoings, so my debt is increasing. It also does not leave me with any money for things like food, drink, detergent (for washing clothes), deodorant etc. Which brings me to my next problem. I'm almost out of food.

Looking through my cupboard and the freezer I currently have the following food left:

• 1kg of rice
• 1.5 kg of pasta spirals
• 1.5kg of frozen crinkle cut chips
• 200-300g of frozen sliced peppers
• About a dozen frozen pork sausages
• 1 frozen Lasagna
• 1 frozen Singapore Noodles
• 1 frozen 800g loaf of thick sliced bread
• About 200g of mild cheddar
• About half a jar of Mixed Fruit jam
• 1 packet of potato mash mix
• 4 packets of BBQ Beef Super Noodles
• 1 sachet of some chinese stir fry sauce
• 1 tin of chicken curry
• 1 tin of chicken in white sauce

Once this has gone I will begin the process of starving. I have a single £1 coin left in my wallet with which I need to buy milk later today, in order that I can have coffee; because while starving is bad, the withdrawal headaches I would get from a lack of caffiene would be worse still. I realise that once the milk runs out (assuming the amount of coffee granules I have doesn't run out first) I will have to face the headaches anyway, but I'd rather delay that for as long as possible.

I'm out of options. I cannot move back home and in good conscience I can't ask my parents for money. Mum has helped me out with money too many times before as it is. My housemates can't help me, Gareth has financial problems of his own right now and Tony has already helped out as much as he is able too. To the best of my knowledge none of my other friends are in any better position to be able to help out either, and even if they were, I have no way of knowing when or even how I could ever repay them.

I have an interview with the Job Centre next Monday (March 5th) to discuss my situation. By the time I sit down with them I will have likely gone a couple days without food already. I will also almost certainly be suffering with a headache.

Independent Love Song

Time for another song lyric post I think and I'm a big fan of this particular song. I like how it's very different from a typical love song, as most such songs tend to extole the virtues of being in love, or falling in (or out of) love. Not this one though. This is a song that's being sung by a woman who is no stranger to sex, she states clearly that she will take men home and let them show her the way. But not with this guy. This one means more to her, and so she's going to take the time to teach him how to make love to her, because she wants this to mean more than it has before with those other men. I find that refreshing and the fact that this is sung to a powerful rythmn only adds to it's appeal.

Independent Love Song by Scarlett

You could say this was an independent lovesong
It's nothing like to us what love meant to them
But that's not to say the love we
have isn't big or that strong
I'm doing it a different way
I'm doing it a different way

You might say this is another boring lovesong
To be together and forever be true
And so today it's much the same as it was then
I'm doing it a different way
I'm doing it a different way

I'll show you how to take me
Go down go down
And I'll show you how to turn me
Right on right on
And I'll show you how to touch me
Right on right on right on
Right on right on right on

Now it's fine that many men will look my way
And I'll take them home and let
them show me the way
And sure I'll like a few but I'll
leave the rest to play
I'm doing it a different way
I'm doing it a different way

I'm gonna show you how to take me
Go down go down
And I'll show you how to turn me
Right on right on
And I'll show you how to touch me
Right on right on right on
Right on right on right on

In a different way, in a different way
In a different way, in a different way
In a different way, in a different way

I'll show you how to take me
Go down go down me
And I'll show you how to turn me
Right on right on
And I'll show you how to touch me
Right on right on right on
Right on right on right on

You could say this was an independent lovesong
It's nothing like to us what love meant to them
But that's not to say the love we have
isn't good or that strong
I'm doing it a different way
I'm doing it a different way