Another Day, Another Scam

This one is pretty typical really and to be honest the only reason I'm even posting it on here, is because it specifically asks me to keep the mail confidential. I see no reason to help a con artist out, so here's the phishing email I got in my Junk Mail folder today:

Attention,

I do apologise for intruding into your privacy, do kindly permit me to introduce myself. I am Ejner Andersen, a staff with Rand Merchant Bank (RMB) South Africa. I have taken time out to source the right individual, which is your humble self. I possess valuable and classified information of great interest which i wish to share with you.

I also need to ascertain your dispositions towards receiving and utilising information from me that guarantees you being legally acknowledged as the sole surviving relative of an investor (name with-held) who died in Korean Air Line, flight number801 on 6th of August 1997 without naming a next of kin to his fund in my bank. And for your perusal you can view this site:
http://www.cnn.com/WORLD/9708/06/guam.passenger.list

I would want you to understand that this is a DEAL.

I have all the legal and banking details of the deceased client that will facilitate putting you forward as the claimant/beneficiary of the funds and ultimately transfer of the Inheritance.

Consequently, my proposal is that i will like you as a Foreigner to stand in as the next of kin of the funds deposited in my bank. I am writing you because since am a public servant, i cannot operate a foreign account.

Contact me with your full legal names and contact telephone number for further verbal correspondence.

You must maintain a great deal of confidentiality towards this endeavour.

I await your urgent response.

Thanks and my regards.
Mr.Ejner Andersen

NOTE: If however, you are not disposed to assist, kindly delete/destroy this email in view of the confidentiality of the proposed transaction and interest of personalities involved.

The Living Daylights

While there are 21 (soon to be 22) James Bond movies of the official series (the number rises to 24/25 if you count in the unofficial movies of Never Say Never Again and the original Casino Royale), my favourite would have to be the 1st of Timothy Dalton's two outings as 007. Not just for the plot, which while convoluted (and not helped by the slightly comedic villains) is still quite a believeable premise, but also for Dalton's hard edged take on Bond himself, which would only be bettered by Daniel Craig's version years later. Of course another good reason for my love of the film is the awesome theme song by A-ha, one of my favourite of all the many Bond theme songs (and there are so many to choose from!).

The Living Daylights by A-ha

Hey driver, where're we going?
I swear my nerves are showing

Set my hopes up way too high
living's in the way we die.

Comes the morning and the headlights fade in rain

Of hundred thousand people
I'm the one they frame.
I've been waiting long for one of us to say:
Save the darkness
let it never fade away -
In the living daylights
in the living daylights.

Alright
hold on tight now
it's down
down to the wire

Set your hopes up way too high
living's in the way we die.

Comes the morning and the headlights fade away

Hundred thousand changes
everything's the same.
I've been waiting long for one of us to say:
Save the darkness
let it never fade away -
In the living daylights
living daylights
living daylights.

Comes the morning and the headlights fade away

Hundred thousand people
I'm the one they frame
In the living daylights
in the living daylights.

Living daylights
- set your hopes up way too high
Living daylights
- living's in the way we die -
Living daylights
- set your hopes up way too high -
Living daylights
- living's in the way we die -

A Royal Flush?

Another day, another con trick arrives in my email. I've not posted one for a while as after a while they all tend to read very much the same as each other. This one though is inventive and I thought it worth adding to my online collection of pathetic scams. Have a read of this:

Hello,
I beleive i can call you friend. I am Prince Jefri Bolkiah of Brunei.I am the youngest of the Sultan's three brothers.But its like a joke being called a prince. The Bruneian royal family have turned me into an out cast. I am presently on exile in London.

My Brother the Sultan of Brunei masterminded and initiated much evil against me.He envied me as a person,he envied my life style,he was intimidated by my way of life,and thus plotted with his infidel advisers to get me arrested for noting. He leveled all forms of corruption allegations against me. He accused me of taking US$40 billion of the royal treasury's money. He labelled me a criminal and ordered for my arrest. My Brother the Sultan of Brunei did this to me his younger brother.

Yes i agree that I spent Money, but I am bewildered by the accusation that i misspent $40 billion. It's not that easy to hide, I keep asking the lawyers, Where did it go?. I have already turned over billions of dollars worth of property, including the Plaza Athénée hotel in Paris,The New York Palace Hotel, the giant yacht, the car collection, and more than 100 paintings by Picasso, Renoir, Modigliani and others. Late last year, I surrendered five rare diamonds, secured in a London vault, valued at roughly $200 million.

My Brother the Sultan, Hassanal Bolkiah, has ruled since 1967.He is the world's wealthiest ruler, with an estimated fortune of $22 billion. DESPITE HIS WEALTH, he still feels intimidated by my little Money.
I have turned over the various assets, but my brother the Sultan will not let me keep enough money to maintain a more modest version of my prior lifestyle. Now the Sultan's advisers have started legal proceedings to evict me from my London mansion. We don't know where we are going to live. They want me to give it all back, now i am worried that i may soon be homeless and forced into bankruptcy.

While in Brunei,my favorite car to drive was a Ferrari 550, a sleek sports coupe that i used to take for a spin late at night when the roads were quiet. Now, I like the Mini. I drive a black small mini around London. I am been watched by private detectives employed by my Brother the Sultan.He wants to ruin me,but he cannot.

My friend, i dont know you, but from my little snooping into your profile, i strongly feel you can be of help to me.I want you to take me as a friend in need and do something for me that will also benefit you. Right now i cannot trust any body close to me.I have been betrayed by my friends and family and I am tired of talking to lawyers. I prefer to take the Risk of solicitng the assistance of a stranger. You may think i am going crazy,but i am very sane.

I still have billions of dollars safe and secure in safe countries, but i cannot touch these funds hence they are discovered by my King Brother watching my every move like a Hawk. I need you to assist me in these financial steps of securing my entitlements. You will benefit immensely from these finanacial exercise.

I am an easy going gentleman, so please be rest assured that my business relationship with you will be very sincere and the friendship will extend to our childrens.

Yours Sincerely,
Prince Jefri Bolkiah.

A Charitable Con Trick

This is a new scam, well at least it is new to me anyway as I've certainly never before encountered a phishing scam email quite like this one. Myself, Gareth and Tony did get a good laugh out of reading it though. As always I have posted it exactly as I received it, typos and all. Enjoy!

Greetings,
 
As you read this, don't feel sorry for me, because it is the destiny of every Human being to die someday. I am Mr. Nabil Malik a naturalised Briton by birth and a business merchant presently undergoing treatment in Gibraltar.I have been diagnosed with Oesophageal cancer.
 
It has defiled all forms of medical treatment, and right now I have only about a few months to live, according to medical Reports. I regret that I have not particularly lived my life so well, as I never really cared for anyone (not even myself), but my trade. Though I am very well to do, I was never open handed; I was always hostile to people and regarded them like they never had hopes of becoming as successful as myself. Now I know that there is a lot more to life than just prosperity.
 
I believe that when I am given a second chance to come to this world, I would live my life a different way from how I have lived it. Now that death is eminent, I have willed and given most of my belonging to immediate and extended family members, as well as a few close friends. I want Allah to be merciful to me and accept my soul. Hence I have decided to support charity work; this is what i want to be remembered for. So far, I have been able to reach out to a few charity organizations in the Singapore, Algeria and Malaysia. Now that my health has deteriorated so badly, I cannot do this myself anymore.
 
I once asked members of my family to aid me in giving of alms to those organizations catering for the less Privileged in Bulgaria and Pakistan; they refused and kept the resources to themselves. Hence, I do not trust them anymore, as they seem not to be contented with what I have left for them.
 
The last of my belonging which no Relative knows of,is the deposit of Eight Million US dollars (US$8,000,000.00) that I have in a safe Deposit company abroad, which I will want you to secure and bestow to charity organizations.
 
Please endeavour to reply me via email.For your time and devotion, I have set aside a tenth of this for you.May the good lord be with you.
 
Mr. Nabil Malik

A New Scam

Well new to me anyway as I've not previously had a scam email quite like this one arrive in my mailbox. It is still very obviously a scam though and clearly written ages ago (with a small update to try and keep it modern). As always when I post one of these, I post it exactly as I received it, complete with typo's and all. Check this out:

From:Mr Dennis BrokmanRE: YOUR PAYMENT NOTIFICATION
Remittance Manager
NATWEST BANK PLC
Phone Number:+44-7024013922
Email: atm.manager@gmail.com
www.natwest.com

Attention:Beneficiary
This is to officially inform you that we have verified your contract
file presently on my desk, and I found out that you have not received
your payment due to your lack of co-operation and not fulfilling the
obligations giving to you in respect to your contract payment.
Secondly, you
are hereby advised to stop dealing with some non-officials in the bank
as this is an illegal act and will have to stop if you so wish to
receive your payment immediately.After the board meeting held at our
headquarters, we have resolved in finding a solution to your problem,
and as
you may know, we have arranged your payment through our SWIFT CARD
PAYMENT CENTER in Europe, America,Africa and Asia Pacific, which is
the
instruction given by our Prime Minister, Tony Blair of United Kingdom.
And
this instruction is still ask to be carried out by the new Prime
Minister of the United Kingdom of Great Britain Dr James Gordon Brown
MP
This card center will send you an ATM CARD which you will use to
withdraw
your money in any ATM MACHINE in any part of the world, But the
maximum
is ($21,000.00) Thousand Us Dollars per Limit. So, if you like to
receive your fund this way

(1) Full Name as wanted on Card
(2) Address where you want the payment center to send your
ATM CARD.(NO P O BOX)
(3) Phone And Fax Number
(4) Date Of Birth
(5) Occupation

SEND THE ABOVE INFORMATION TO : atm.manager@gmail.com

We shall be expecting to receive your information you have stop any
further communication with anybody or office. On this regards, do not
hesitate to contact me for more details and direction, and also please
do
update me with any new development.

Thanks for your co-operation.
Best Regards,
Mr Dennis Brokman
Remittance Manager
NATWEST BANK PLC

Note: Because of impostors, we hereby issue you with a private code for security, Your code shall be (CARD 4654:2008) Make this code your reference number when contacting us.Failure to do so might cause delay in getting back to you.

What's really funny about this is that I'm not even with Natwest Bank!

What D&D Character Am I?

I Am A: True Neutral Human Sorcerer/Rogue (2nd/2nd Level)


Ability Scores:

Strength-13

Dexterity-10

Constitution-11

Intelligence-13

Wisdom-13

Charisma-11


Alignment:
True Neutral A true neutral character does what seems to be a good idea. He doesn't feel strongly one way or the other when it comes to good vs. evil or law vs. chaos. Most true neutral characters exhibit a lack of conviction or bias rather than a commitment to neutrality. Such a character thinks of good as better than evil after all, he would rather have good neighbors and rulers than evil ones. Still, he's not personally committed to upholding good in any abstract or universal way. Some true neutral characters, on the other hand, commit themselves philosophically to neutrality. They see good, evil, law, and chaos as prejudices and dangerous extremes. They advocate the middle way of neutrality as the best, most balanced road in the long run. True neutral is the best alignment you can be because it means you act naturally, without prejudice or compulsion. However, true neutral can be a dangerous alignment because it represents apathy, indifference, and a lack of conviction.


Race:
Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, sporting unusual hairstyles, fanciful clothes, tattoos, and the like.


Primary Class:
Sorcerers are arcane spellcasters who manipulate magic energy with imagination and talent rather than studious discipline. They have no books, no mentors, no theories just raw power that they direct at will. Sorcerers know fewer spells than wizards do and acquire them more slowly, but they can cast individual spells more often and have no need to prepare their incantations ahead of time. Also unlike wizards, sorcerers cannot specialize in a school of magic. Since sorcerers gain their powers without undergoing the years of rigorous study that wizards go through, they have more time to learn fighting skills and are proficient with simple weapons. Charisma is very important for sorcerers; the higher their value in this ability, the higher the spell level they can cast.


Secondary Class:
Rogues have little in common with each other. While some - maybe even the majority - are stealthy thieves, many serve as scouts, spies, investigators, diplomats, and simple thugs. Rogues are versatile, adaptable, and skilled at getting what others don't want them to get. While not equal to a fighter in combat, a rogue knows how to hit where it hurts, and a sneak attack can dish out a lot of damage. Rogues also seem to have a sixth sense when it comes to avoiding danger. Experienced rogues develop nearly magical powers and skills as they master the arts of stealth, evasion, and sneak attacks. In addition, while not capable of casting spells on their own, a rogue can sometimes 'fake it' well enough to cast spells from scrolls, activate wands, and use just about any other magic item.


Find out What Kind of Dungeons and Dragons Character Would You Be?, courtesy of Easydamus (e-mail)

State Of The Bob Address

So it's my birthday today. Another year of my life has passed me by without me having really achieved anything apart from grow a bit older. I tried to lose weight this year and for a time succeeded, but I'm pretty sure it's all come back home now. I certainly don't feel any slimmer anymore. I think my level of debt has decreased but not by much. Hopefully the court case that the the Office of Fair Trading began against the banks on Monday will resolve the disputed bank fees case and I can claim back the seven thousand pounds that HSBC has overcharged me over the past six years. That money would go a long way towards sorting out my life.

Despite all my efforts, I have been single all year long, and while I've had a few chats with women and even flirted a bit, nothing has come of any of it. I'm obviously hoping for better luck in the year to come, but I'm not exactly going to hold my breath on that score. No matter how optimistic I try to be about my prospects for finding a partner, something always brings reality into focus. Currently that would be my rather pitiful rating on the Hot or Not feature on my Facebook account, where after 60 votes I currently rate a dismal 3.4 out of 10! Not that that overly surprises me. I keep telling the people who tell me that I'm attractive, that if I was truly attractive, that people would be attracted to me... and nobody is!

Today will be spent the same way I've celebrated my birthday for the past few years, namely I'll be spending the day with my best friend Tony Searle (whose birthday it is also), and together we'll be grabbing lunch at Pizza Hut, followed by watching 2-3 movies back to back and then likely hitting the Hollywood Bowl for bowling and beers to round off the evening.

So that's it really, another year gone and pretty much wasted. I continue to plod on through life without any real aim or desire save to reach the end of it. Only in that sense can the past year be viewed as a sucess, as I am one year further along the path to the end of my life. Far too many more to go though it seems. Guess I'll just take them one year at a time same way everyone else does and maybe somewhere along the way I'll find a reason to wish they passed me by a bit slower than they do. But I didn't find her this year.

Sorry Lady, But I'm An Atheist!

Heh got another zany scam junk email today which I thought I'd share with the world. I have to admit, this is a novel angle that I've not encountered before. It's still really obviously a con trick though. Have a read of this:

From Mrs. Jessie castor

ENDEAVOR TO USE IT FOR THE CHILDREN OF GOD.

I am the above named person from Czech Republic. I am married to Mr. Jeffery castor who worked with Czech Republic embassy in Egypt for nine years before he died in the year 2006.We were married for eleven years without a child. He died after a brief illness that lasted for only four days. Before his death we were both born again Christians. Since his death I decided not to re-marry or get a child outside my matrimonial home which the Bible is against. When my late husband was alive he deposited the sum of 7.2 Million Dollars (seven Million two hundred thousand United State Dollars) with a Bank.

Presently, this money is still with the Bank Recently, My Doctor told me that I would not last for the next three months due to cancer problem. Though what disturbs me most is my stroke sickness. Having known my condition I decided to donate this Fund to church or better still a Christian individual that will utilize this money the way I am going to instruct here in. I want a church that will use these funds to fund churches, orphanages and widows propagating the word of God and to ensure that the house of God is maintained. The Bible made us to understand that blessed is the hand that gives. I took this decision because I don't have any child that will inherit this money and my husband relatives are not Christians and I don't want my husband's hard earned money to be misused by unbelievers. I don't want a situation where this money will be used in an ungodly manner.

Hence the reason for taking this bold decision. I am not afraid of death hence I know where I am going. I know that I am going to be in the bosom of the Lord. Exodus 14 VS 14 says that the lord will fight my case and I shall hold my peace. I don't need any telephone communication in this regard because of my health and because of the presence of my husband's relatives around me always. I don't want them to know about this development.With God all things are possible.

As soon as I receive your reply I shall give you the contact of the Bank, I will also issue you a letter of authority that will prove you as the original- beneficiary of this Fund. I want you and the church to always pray for me because the lord is my shepherd. My happiness is that I lived a life of a worthy Christian. Whoever that wants to serve the Lord must serve him in spirit and truth. Please always be prayerful all through your life. Any delay in your reply will give me room in sourcing for a church or Christian individual for this same purpose. Please assure me that you will act accordingly as I stated herein.

Hoping to hear from you.

I have set aside 20% for your assistance and for your time and 10% for any expenses if there is any. Remain blessed in the name of the Lord.

Yours in Christ,

Mrs. Jessie castor
EMAIL: cas14142@aim.com